Daniel Min
I wrestled a lot with my decision to sign up for missions this summer. Yes, I had an amazing experience when I went to Nicaragua 2 years ago and I did have a desire to go back one day. But going on missions for one entire month was not how I wanted to spend the last summer before becoming a corporate employee for the rest of my life. I wanted to travel, have fun with friends, and just relax. However, as the application deadline for STSM approached, the commitment that I prayed about in the beginning of the year kept on coming back to my mind. When 2024 started, my biggest prayer request was that I would set the tone from the very first year of post grad life to seek God first and prioritize Him. I wanted to make sure God was at the center of my life, especially since it’s so easy to get caught up in the busyness, repetition, and the daily grind of corporate life. Ultimately I decided that I needed to put aside my personal desires and decided that God wanted me to dedicate this last “free” summer to serve Him on missions.
Returning to Nicaragua again came with so many blessings. The fruits of Missionary Kim’s faithfulness in this country are always so encouraging to witness, and because it was my second time I could see exactly how much God could move in just 2 years. Throughout her 2 decades in Nicaragua, Missionary Kim had built 5 churches around Nicaragua, each one growing, discipling, and serving the community in their area. I could personally attest to the growth of each location. At the main church, they had built a brand new large infirmary, providing a space for medical missionaries. At one of the church plants, some kids who used to be huge trouble makers two years ago, were now helping us during VBS and had a completely different view of church. And the infamous steep muddy climb up to one of the churches (many of us fell last time) was now transformed into a new and safe paved road.
However, along with many blessings, one major challenge of returning a second time was the feeling of repetitiveness as I served. Since it was my second time, I didn’t have the “shock factor” of visiting a developing country. It is striking to see the poverty and brokenness in some of the villages that we visited, and normally this would make someone be more motivated to love on these kids. But in the 3rd week when we visited one of these villages, it suddenly struck me that my heart was full of complacency during ministry. And what was even more alarming was that this feeling was exactly how it felt like when I am serving at home. I thought that by going on missions I would feel inspired to serve God. I thought that by seeing the brokenness in Nicaragua, I would have more sympathy and a larger heart for the lost. I was hoping for a spiritual high that would inspire me to serve and seek God more, but whether I am in Nicaragua or not, serving is the same, my heart is the same, and my relationship with God is the same. Going on missions does not change any of these things.
One moment where I felt that God was rebuking my complacency in serving was on the very last day of VBS ministry. We went to a church that was not a church plant, so we didn’t know what to expect, only that there would be more kids showing up there than any other location up to that point. When I heard this news, deep down I was dreading that day. However, when we finally got to the location, there was no one there. Unlike previous churches, not a single kid was waiting for us when we arrived. While I didn’t dare say anything out loud, deep down I was celebrating. We had been doing ministry for weeks and since no one showed up, we could finally relax! It was at this moment where I suddenly felt God rebuking me. Why am I celebrating the lack of ministry? Why am I celebrating not being able to spread the Gospel? My reaction was also completely different than Missionary Kim’s. I could tell she was a little discouraged, but she didn't want this situation to prevent us from doing ministry. She told us that for the first hour we would go door to door and invite people to the church. She said that she believes that God has sent us to this location for a reason. And she explained that if we could share the love of God to even one child that doesn’t know Jesus, today would be a huge success. Her heart for the people of Nicaragua was so evident. She has been here for two decades, yet she is not complacent. Her heart yearns so deeply for one additional person to hear the Gospel. Like Missionary Kim, my heart should break for the lost.
My takeaway from this moment is that the time I have to serve God is so precious. I should not take this time for granted, not only on missions, but also when I serve Him at home. I now have a new understanding of what it means to have a heart for serving. As I serve at church I will constantly remind myself to joyfully and humbly serve Him. I must remember that the focus of serving is always about God and not myself. There are so many parallels between my time in Nicaragua and back home. My prayer is that God will really use my experiences in Nicaragua to mold and shape me as I enter this new life stage at home.
