SONIA LIM

STSM was something that has always struck my interest since freshman year. I was convinced that I would go during my freshman year, but I ended up letting the deadline pass, missing my opportunity. Looking back, I realize that God was calling me to wait for the right time. I think God knew that I wasn’t prepared to go on STSM quite yet and that He wanted me to grow a little more before He opened that door for me. After finishing freshman year and moving into sophomore year, I felt God gradually opening up the door for me and He was patiently waiting for me to follow through. It was at Wintercon that I finally stepped into that door. During the prayer time for STSM, I felt a strong conviction from God, telling me that He wants me to join the work He is already doing in the nations.

Two main lessons I have learned from my time in South India: the importance of relying on God and rejoicing in Him, no matter the circumstances.

Lesson 1: Relying on God

John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. He who remains in me and I in him, bears much fruit; for without me you can do nothing.” This was one of the memory verses that all STSM trainees had to memorize during our training sessions. I feel like during my time in South India, this verse was something I was able to live out. I truly was able to see, in real time, I am nothing without God. Looking back, I realize how it was truly because of God’s goodness and power that I was able to do His works for His glory. Our ministry days would always be jam-packed with activities like VBS and discipleship training, yet I never felt tired or defeated. Rather, I felt energized and excited during our ministry. I was able to draw strength from my fellow teammates and the students at St Paul School. But above all, God was the one giving me strength to push through each day. Especially during discipleship training, I relied on God to soften the kids’ hearts to be open to hearing the gospel. After surrendering this prayer to God, I felt Him working in these students. By the end of the discipleship training, many of the girls I had were willing to accept Jesus, which was a powerful testament to how God truly is working and has been working in India.

Lesson 2: Rejoicing in God

Throughout my time in South India, there were many joyful days, but there were also days when it was hard to put on a front. There were a few times when I felt physically, mentally, and emotionally drained, yet I tried to maintain a smile for the kids. There were many times when I would complain internally but say outwardly that I was okay. I found myself questioning, “Why am I doing this? Is what I am doing even beneficial? Why was I even called to missions?”. However, after visiting the village churches, I came to realize why I was called on missions. God was trying to show me what it meant to have genuine joy in Him. I was able to see this through the villagers at these churches during the worship sessions. These villagers’ only form of instrument was a tambourine and their voices. Even with such limited resources, they were still worshipping so passionately and joyfully. God was very much humbling me at this time.

One of the hardest parts of the trip was our last week of traveling. I personally found it to be very hard this week to be joyful. From long train/bus rides to the rising temperatures, as we continued going up north, I slowly started to feel myself getting more sensitive and pessimistic. I thought to myself, “Why are we even traveling? Why couldn’t we just stay in Bangalore and do another week of ministry?”. I couldn’t seem to find the purpose of this travel week. So I prayed to God to give me a joyful heart and understand the purpose of this travel week. Through that prayer, God began to constantly remind me of the cross and what Jesus did for me. Through that, I now had the mindset of “Jesus did so much for me which I was so undeserving of, I should be able to do these things for his kingdom without grumbling”. With this constant reminder, I was able to let go of my pessimistic thoughts and truly see the joy in this travel week. I started to think of this travel week as a privilege and honor because I was able to witness how God was moving in the northern cities of India and how I could be of help by praying over each city. The verses that keep coming to mind is from 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 which says, “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstance; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” I think this verse resonated a lot with the travel week we went through. No matter what circumstance we are placed in, we should continue to rejoice, pray, and give thanks to the Lord for this is His will for us. God’s will for me was to come to India and experience all these things so that my eyes are more open to the beauty of His kingdom and of Him.

All in all, I have learned and received so much from going to South India this summer. I truly believe that God worked through me in such powerful ways for the nation of India. Although I was not able to see any fruit during my time in South India, I can confidently say that I was able to at least plant the seeds of His kingdom through the ministry and traveling my team and I did. Now coming back, I hope to continue this missional life at home, church, and school. I pray that I may continue to rely on God and rejoice in Him, no matter the circumstances.