TOBY LEE

I initially decided to go on missions because I wanted to be stretched and challenged in ways that would increase my faith, and through hearing the testimonies of the people that went before me, I thought STSM would be a good opportunity for me to experience these things. I was also curious about missions and was very eager just to learn.

Throughout the entirety of our ministry, we spent the majority of our time with students from kindergarten to 12th grade from the different St. Paul School campuses. Our team would frequently lead discipleship groups where we’d be placed in a group of around ten students who were mostly Hindu and be given the chance to share the gospel with our own testimonies. At first this was the most intimidating and challenging aspect of ministry for me because I felt insufficient in my knowledge and doubted my ability to effectively minister to these students and answer all their questions about Christianity. I was too focused on what I was able to bring to the table and how I’d be able to make these students learn and grow. Eventually, through prayer and conversations with some people, I was able to realize that my job isn’t to bring about growth in these students but it is only to share the gospel and love them, and trust in the ways God will use what I do. This realization brought me a lot of peace during times of ministry and helped show me that I was putting too much faith in myself and not enough faith in God and in His power. 

As I continued to share the gospel in my discipleship groups, I started to gain a deep appreciation for it and for the first time really felt the significance of Jesus’ sacrifice for me and how incredible the love that I receive from Him is. I felt an overwhelming gratitude and immense joy in knowing the Lord and what He’s done for me. This gratitude that I experienced helped fuel me for the rest of the trip and I was able to be motivated and energized in all aspects of serving because of how much love I felt from Him. I had always heard others talk about how all that we do should be a reaction to the love that we’ve received first and I was never really sure about what that looked like or how to feel that abundance. I really experienced it for the first time in India as I shared the gospel repeatedly and the truths that I was speaking to the children there started to become much more real and significant to me.

Through this gratitude that I felt, the things that I took pride in were revealed to me, especially things that I had I believed to be results of my own ability, but were actually just testaments to God’s grace. I had believed that my physical toughness was what kept me going and safe and healthy but God showed me the ways that He has been taking care of me. Through experiencing the love and hospitality everywhere we went, it became easy to see how it was God and all of His provisions that were sustaining me and not anything that came from myself. 

A large part of our ministry was leading VBS for the children at the different schools which mainly consisted of presenting dances and skits to the students there and also making crafts with them that we had prepared in advance. Some of the students that we met did not know any English which made interacting with them a little more difficult but through this challenge I came to learn the importance of love. When we visited a school in Berikai, we did a lot of skits to communicate with them and we played a lot of sports with them and just got to know them. Even though we weren’t able to directly talk to the children about the gospel, it was a good reminder that just loving the kids alone is a testimony in itself of God’s love for us and the gift that we’ve received. 

Looking back on the trip, I am so grateful for how God has been working in my life and the opportunities I’ve had to experience His love for me and for the people of India. The passion that I gained for the gospel is something that will be ingrained in me and will be fundamental to the way I live my life going forward.